Comment to follow QT today:
Obama winning one for the Gipper?
Barack Obama, even as the Fourth of July approaches, saying again that America isn't great but needs major improvements:
"For those who have abandoned hope, we'll restore hope and we'll welcome them into a great national crusade to make America great again."
Maybe the critics do have a point about Obama always cutting down America, always --
Wait. That was Ronald Reagan speaking in 1980.
Sorry.
QT political advice:
Rush Limbaugh expressing shock at the idea that some of Barack Obama's opponents may have questioned his patriotism:
"There might be some fringe people out there, for crying out loud, but who is doing it?"
Fair enough.
And if you ever hear anyone cast doubts on Barack Obama's patriotism, feel free to look that person in the eye and say:
"Rush Limbaugh says you are from the lunatic fringe."
I'm going to have to use that...
I'm not even going to try and figure out how or why I missed QT yesterday, but that means you get two of them today!
Monday first:
Cost-cutting stops hereQT Trickle-On Economics Update:
The CEO of American Axle, which is cutting half its American work force to increase profits, was given an $8.5 million bonus, which, together with his $5.5 million regular compensation, amounts to a third of the company’s profits from last year.
That's what happens when you run a business for maximum profit, short-term.
The next step being that the company, for all practical purposes, ceases to exist in the United States.
And Tuesday:
Wish you were thereToday is International Joke Day, during which you might or might not hear about the two antennae that got married, and the wedding wasn't much, but the reception was great.
Or...so, y'see, this guy loses the election but still gets into office, see...
Well, I wish it were a joke...
As long as QT is there, I will be pointing the way to QT:
Write onTo all those on the Internet who are endlessly forwarding the e-mail -- "Below are a few lines from Obama's books; in his words!" -- that includes such lines as:
• • "I found a solace in nursing a pervasive sense of grievance and animosity against my mother's race."
• • "I will stand with the Muslims should the political winds shift in an ugly direction."
Barack Obama never wrote these sentences.
Put it another way: These sentences are made up.
Today's definition of the Internet: Countless people breathlessly waving copies of books they haven't read.
Some big oil info, courtesy of QT:
Oil's wellNews Item: Supreme Court accepts argument from Exxon that $2.5 billion in damages awarded in the Exxon Valdez oil spill was "excessive."
"Excessive" hardly begins begin to describe it. It takes Exxon more than 19 days to register $2.5 billion in net profit.
I would imagine it's all a matter of perspective...
Due to some rather grisly finds up in Canada, may I please present QT's two-step entry:
News Item: "Mystery lingers as five feet wash ashore in Canada."
T.T., a Chicago reader, theorizes that others may have been caught in the undertoe.
Step 2.
News Item: "Canadian officials say sixth floating foot was a hoax."
Daryl Collard, a Victoria, B.C., reader, wonders if the police were embarrassed by the faux paw.
Proving yet again that sometimes the only way to make sense of something is to laugh.
Regarding another one of those pesky amendments, thanks to QT:
Swiftboating, circa 2008News Item: Christian fundamentalists attack Barack Obama for saying the United States is ''no longer a Christian nation'' but ''also a Jewish nation, a Muslim nation, and a Buddhist nation, and a Hindu nation, and a nation of nonbelievers.''
Exactly. Obama shows his secret radical roots once again
Or as earlier radicals put it:
''Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.''
Seems simple enough, doesn't it?
QT brings us a campaign finance story today:
McCain could give Obama a tip
John McCain criticizing Barack Obama's flip-flop against public campaign financing:
"I'm especially disturbed by this decision of Sen. Obama's because he signed his name on a piece of paper, signed his name."
With both candidates busy reversing early positions for the general election, Obama's inexperience is starting to tell.
McCain could have told him:
Never sign anything when you're in mid-pander.
Of course, I could point you to This Modern World right about now if you wanted to learn a bit more about Obama, McCain, and public financing. I could do that.
QT tells us that things could be getting interesting in Kentucky:
Getting creative in Kentucky• • The Creation Museum at www .creationmuseum.org invites you to visit its new facility on Bullittsburg Church Road in Petersburg, Ky.
• • The Evolution Museum at www .evolutionmuseum.org invites you to donate toward the building of a new facility on Bullittsburg Church Road in Petersburg, Ky.
We might want to keep a closer eye on Bullittsburg Church Road in Petersburg, Ky.
Wheee!
As long as I mentioned oil earlier, QT points out another fact:
Hole in McCain's oil plan
News Item: "The oil industry generally approved Tuesday as Republican presidential candidate John McCain charted his policies on energy with a speech in Houston. . . ."
Well. As long as the oil companies are happy. . . .
The oil companies, by the way, are currently leasing 68 million acres of land in this country that they are not drilling on
That is how eager they are to increase supply.
What do you think the reason might be?
The mystery continues...
Sure, there's regular QT:
Bushwhacked
News Item (2005): John McCain votes with President Bush 77 percent of the time.
News Item (2006): John McCain votes with President Bush 89 percent of the time.
News Item (2007): John McCain votes with President Bush 95 percent of the time.
News Item (2008): John McCain votes with President Bush 100 percent of the time.
Add mavericks to the list of things that aren't what they used to be.
...and then there's the combo platter!
QT:
Gore, Obama will discover whether climate is right for change
Chant of the crowd at Al Gore's endorsement of Barack Obama in Detroit:
"We need change! We need change! We need change!"
Slogans are fine. The trick is not to sound like 20,000 angry panhandlers.
CHICAGO—According to witnesses, a loud black man approached a crowd of some 4,000 strangers in downtown Chicago Tuesday and made repeated demands for change.
As only The Onion can do it...
I'm too damn tired to post any more than QT for now, but it is a worthwhile post:
Well . . . OK
Skip Hermann, a Chicago reader, writes:
"Is there any chance of you mentioning a fund-raiser for the Wounded Heroes Foundation, which helps wounded veterans and their families with care packages, financial grants and in many other ways that are described at www.woundedheroesfund.net, from 9 p.m. to midnight Wednesday, July 2, at Manor, 642 N. Clark, with a $10 donation at the door suggested?"
Try to get serious. What have our soldiers ever done for us?
You know the answer to that, I would hope.
On another note, read the rest of QT today. There are some annoyingly true entries.
Oy, vey, QT:
It's all downhill from hereFrom the QT Archive of Knowledge:
• • Charles Foster Kane's other sled was named "Crusader."
• • Giraffes are kosher.
Someone, somewhere is going to be asked about one of these in the next couple of days...
Has, apparently, been delayed due to circumstances beyond my control:
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If only because I enjoy QT so:
Letting nature take its course?
News Item: ". . . With membership slightly down last year, and flat for the past five, Southern Baptists face a growing anxiety about their future as they gather for their annual meeting . . ."
We may just have to wait and see how this evolves.
HA!
Though there will never be a shortage of older people willing to exploit the young for such idiotic missions, QT notices the faintest glimmer of humanity out there:
Doom isn't selling
News Item: Militant Islamic fundamentalists have increasing trouble recruiting new suicide bombers.
Humanity's one hope being that it will eventually run low on idiots.
We can only hope...
QT reminds us that it's going to be a long 5 months of this wit:
Keep your head up
Blog headline: "The audacity of hype."
Blog headline: "The audacity of nope."
Blog headline: "The audacity of dopes."
Blog headline: "The audacity of mopes."
Blog headline: "The audacity of hoops."
Only 149 days to go . . .
I'll say it again.
If we had only known the plan, maybe things would be different.
Step 1. Destroy all the things that make your country special.
Step 2. Watch as the immigration "problem" solves itself! (via QT)
Turnaround expertsQT Early Warning System:
Statistics indicates that the U.S. economy is causing some immigrants to turn around and go back home.
The computer issues are done for the time being but I just remembered that I forgot QT:
And oh yeah, he's still at-large
News Item (2000): President Clinton proposes legislation to attack the financial foundation of al-Qaida by banning American companies from dealing with foreign companies that launder terrorist money.
News Item (2000): Sen. Phil Gramm (R-Texas), chairman of the Banking Committee, blocks legislation as a "totalitarian" intrusion on American business interests.
Just a quick trip down memory lane with John McCain's chief economic adviser.
In case you were wondering...
Because it's true:
Czar warsDick Cowan, former director of the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws, endorsing a study that recommends medical treatment instead of prison for drug users:
"This is not a war on drugs. This is a social problem. A community problem."
Then again, what do you expect from --
No. Wait. Those are the words of retired Army Gen. Barry McCaffrey, a former U.S. drug czar, endorsing a study that recommends medical treatment instead of prison for drug users.
Sorry.
Cautionary QT today:
Had enough yet?
News Headline: "CIA claims al-Qaida is on defensive."
Let that be a warning to anyone else who plans to attack us.
Seven years later, and you may or may not be on the defensive.
Then again, given what the CIA used to do to encourage the perception of the Soviet threat, who knows?
Poll positionQT 2008 Vote Count Countdown Update:
• • ElectionProjection.com wants you to know that if the presidential election were held this week, Barack Obama would beat John McCain by 293 electoral votes to 245.
• • Then again, Politico.com wants you to know that, four years ago this week, polls were projecting that John Kerry would beat President Bush by 327 electoral votes to 211.
Dammit, dammit, dammit.
One thing I noticed while watching the news yesterday, and QT nails it:
Sticking to the script
• • White House press secretary Dana Perino regarding Scott McClellan's new memoir of deception and incompetence in the White House:
"This is not the Scott we knew."
• • Former White House counselor Dan Bartlett regarding McClellan's memoir:
"This is not the Scott we knew."
• • Karl Rove regarding McClellan's memoir:
"This doesn't sound like Scott, it really doesn't, not the Scott McClellan I've known."
Very nice work. Managed to get their stories straight in no time.
It's amazing, really...
QT seems to have an epiphany about just how far the rightwingery is gone:
Conservatively speakingFormer Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Pa.) regarding people who claim to be conservatives:
"They have this idea that people should be left alone, be able to do whatever they want to do, government should keep our taxes down and keep our regulations low, that we shouldn't get involved in the bedroom, we shouldn't get involved in cultural issues. You know, people should do whatever they want. Well, that is not how traditional conservatives view the world."
And to think Barry Goldwater and Ronald Reagan put one over on us all those years.
Whatever you do, DO NOT Google "santorum" and NEVER look at the image results from a Google search for "santorum."
Fair warning given.
Perhaps QT has a problem with this:
The terrorists win?From Poor QT's Almanack:
On this day in history 329 years ago the British Parliament passed the Habeas Corpus Act, protecting against false arrest and imprisonment. The principles were later incorporated into the U.S. Constitution but are no longer in effect because of fears of the terrorist threat against Americans, many of whom seem to frighten more easily than in the past.
Well, to be fair, we did reject British rule...
If only because she's proving herself to be such a tenacious candidate, QT:
Facts plusNews headline: "Clinton may take delegate fight to convention."
Blog headline: "Hillary Clinton: Obama can have the nomination when they pry it from my cold dead hands in Denver."
As we continue to investigate the subtle differences between the news business and the blog business.
If only because it's true:
What would Mary do?Hillary Clinton continued to build the case that she leads in the popular vote if you don't count the votes at any state caucuses and do count the votes in a disqualified state primary in which her opponent's name wasn't on the ballot as three days remained until National Tap Dance Day.
QT Note: I'd like to direct your attention to the column on the right where I have added a short (and probably growing) blogroll. QT is not, technically, a blog, but it's a nice place to access it, I think.
We have a coincidence!
Last night I read BJ's post at NewsHoggers and shook my head in sad wonder:
1 in 8 Teach Creationism as Science
This morning I go for a chuckle 'round QT way and what do I get?
Teaching from the choir
Lest We Forget that the Dark Ages Were a Faith-Based Initiative (cont'd):
A national survey has found that 16 percent of biology teachers believe "God created human beings pretty much in their present form at one time within the last 10,000 years or so."
And 12 percent say they include this in class as science.
On a side note, I often hear people speak of the Good Old Days. It's an indefinable era, normally, but since the country is still under the spell of the boomers, the accepted period defining the Good Old Days is the '50s.
The funny thing is when I realize that even I recognize that era as a period of Good Old Days myself, even though I didn't experience a single second of the '50s and things weren't even all that good for all of our citizens back then, either. The narrative I think of when the '50s are mentioned is the last decent Republican as president and the Russkies beating us to orbit with Sputnik.
The more I read about Ike lately, the more I like the guy. He was actually smart and, as a war veteran, realized that war should never be a first resort.
He also said this regarding the office of the presidency:
No one should ever sit in this office over 70 years old, and that I know.
And when Sputnik went up and filled the pants of millions of Americans, it seems to me that it suddenly became a good thing to become educated.
Ah, memories...of an era that never was...
If only because it happened 20 miles west of where I'm sitting:
No defenseModern Education + the Criminal Mind =
A man charged with assault in Hibbing, Minn., became angry at his lawyer during the trial, grabbed him from behind, put him in a headlock and punched him in the face before a chair was knocked over and both fell to the floor, police said.
Pure Comedy.
Because the combo of Dana Perino's idiocy and QT's talent for paying attention deserve notice:
Marriage of Minds
White House press secretary Dana Perino regarding the California Supreme Court ruling that struck down a ban on gay marriage:
"It's unfortunate when activist judges continue to seek to redefine marriage by court order -- without regard for the will of the people."
Three of the four justices in the majority were Republicans, for those keeping track.
Once again showing that the definition of activist judges encompasses any judge that the GOP disagrees with.
*Bonus*
I'm not sure where I saw the slogan/bumper sticker/whatever it was, but I laughed:
AGAINST GAY MARRIAGE?
THEN DON'T MARRY A HOMOSEXUAL, YOU MORON!
Have a nice day.
I'm almost too tired to even post today's QT:
Yeah, we're used to 'emFrom Poor QT's Almanack:
On this day in history 751 years ago a tornado that appeared near Windsor, England, was described as "a marvelous sore tempest of weather, the air being darkened on every side from the four corners thereof, and withal chanced such a thunder as few the like had been heard."
Add weather reports to the list of things that aren't what they used to be.
QT found some tech news:
Tone 'em downQT 2008 Presidential Vote Count Countdown Update:
Now available are free cell phone ring tones created from Hillary Clinton's laugh, Barack Obama shouting "Yes we can!" and John McCain calling a young questioner a "little jerk" at www.slate.com/id/2189303.
There is also a ring tone from the sermons of the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, for those who want a ring tone guaranteed to stop conversations in almost any social situation.
HA!
QT:
Rush to judgmentJ.C., a DeKalb reader, writes:
"Is it true the polar ice cap actually grew in size this past year? This is God trying to tell you that you are wrong about global warming. You should listen to God and not Al Gore."
NASA satellite data show that that Arctic perennial ice, which is the ice that should remain year-round, has decreased 50 percent in the last year.
You may have been listening to Rush Limbaugh, who misquotes God a lot.
Don't hold your breath until the next QT comes - It won't be until Sunday!
C'mon...by now you should be expecting QT:
Supply side economicsSen. Byron Dorgan (D-N.D.) wondering at White House opposition to a plan to increase oil supplies by temporarily stopping shipments to the Strategic Petroleum Reserve:
''Why on Earth should we be putting oil underground at a time of record high prices?''
Shows how little he knows. How on Earth can the oil companies manipulate prices if we keep tampering with the supplies?
Kirkrrt?
Missing youToday's asteroid discovered only two days after narrowly missing Earth is Asteroid 2008 JL4, which passed between the Earth and the moon on Saturday.
But look on the bright side. Asteroid 2008 JL4 is the first undiscovered asteroid to narrowly miss Earth in more than six weeks.
That we know of.
Seriously, QT is consistently one of the finest and funniest columns out there.
And I'd like to thank QT for that.
Especially when there is QT about:
Relax -- we've had another delivery
QT Early Warning System:
The world population reached 6,666,666,666 for a moment on Sunday.
Wheeeeee!
As well as channeling Yoda, apparently.
Of course, QT has it figured out fairly well:
QT Three Internet Headlines that Fairly Well Sum Up the Internet (cont'd):
• "The Earth and humanity are doomed."
• "So then there's a psychological perception of syllable-timed language that is not visible in objective data? Yes and no."
• "Hey! Look at me!"
Well, two out of three ain't bad. 